For those of you who do not want to hear about the human body, this is not the post for you. However, this is a post I keep trying to find and it is just not there. What happens to my boobs when I am no longer nursing? How long will it be before I shrink back to that smaller cup size? Is it worth buying an $85 dollar bra because it is the only one in my size that is actually comfortable?
Maybe boobs are more of a topic of conversation for me because I not only have to find a bra, but it must work with a prosthesis. Since I'm not in the target age range for most women with a prosthesis, I really don't like the styles of basic mastectomy bras. For the same price, I can go to a store like Nordstrom and have them sew in a pocket for any bra.
When Isaiah began to give up nursing during the day, and only fed about once a day, I noticed my nursing bras did not fit. I tried to stick it out thinking, I will wait until I REALLY need a new bra. However, my neck started to hurt, and I had to dress up for a special event, so I gave in. My loving husband sent me shopping for clothes and I knew I would hate every dress I tried on if I did not have the right sized bra. We all learned that from shows like What Not To Wear, right? The lady at Nordstrom gave me about 50 different tee shirt style bras to try on after figuring out my size. To my surprise I was the same size, just a different shape. Weird. I was in bra size denial! How was it possible?
I left the store with this bra:
http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/chantelle-intimates-rive-gauche-3286-full-coverage-underwire-t-shirt-bra/3066738?origin=keywordsearch-personalizedsort&contextualcategoryid=2375500&fashionColor=Cappucino&resultback=1094
It comes in two colors and I got it in black. I freaked out when I looked at the price at the end. I promised myself I would base my purchase on fit, not price. Risky, but I needed the right one. This cost me over $80 when I was done with tax. I swallowed and looked at what I had left for a dress. It all worked out, but the problem with loving an $80 bra is that is it hard to consider buying more than one and since one needs at least two, I searched elsewhere hoping to find something similar. However, I am still thrilled with this bra after 6 months of wearing it and it even still looks new. No signs of stretch, so maybe it would be worth having a few of these. Even with such perfection, I opted out of running back to buy another one because I keep expecting to lose my nursing boob size.
So that was six months ago and rotating one fitting bra with two that are way too small (4 babies ago) I started to look at True&Co. Most of their bras they put in my personal shop after taking the quiz were $68 or less. Plus, there is a free at home try on option. I really liked this because I never have 2 hours to try on bras at multiple stores. I got my first box and almost nothing fit, but one bra. It was in a color I hated, but I kept it anyway because it was pretty comfortable. Overall, I still like my Nordstrom Chantelle bra, but this one works well too. It has not held up looking new for very long. I got the bra in beige, so that might be part of it. I am still happy with the purchase and attempted a second round of at home try on bras. This time I was thrilled because I loved the fit and the bra that worked actually looked cute too. Plus, it has the option of being worn two different ways. I will post those links:
Bra 1
https://trueandco.com/bras/triumph/everyday-magic-wire/2363
cost me $46
Bra 2
https://trueandco.com/bras/betsy-johnson/stocking-stripe/2571
cost me $48
Both of these bras cost me way less than two Chantelle bras, but I still feel like the Chantelle bra is my favorite. I also had to sew my own pockets into the True&Co bras. However, the quality of these bras are great. My experience shopping has been very nice. I sometimes question if I am working with the correct size because I'm still in denial that nothing has changed after a few months of not nursing, but that is just how it is. I will say everything on this list works really well with a prosthesis. I looked for full coverage bras that have a built in shape, so it is easy to sew in a pocket. These all sort of have a similar shape to nursing bras, but are really pretty.
I hate spending money on things I'm not sure I will be able to wear for long, but the fact is, the right bra size is important. If things change then great, but if they don't it helps a lot to have the right bra. I felt bad about my $80 bra purchase, but it has been the greatest so far. I like my other to bras, and I am still thinking they may not work for long, so I'd rather spend less and still have the right size, then spend much more for 3 of the perfect bra, but that is just me. I should also say that my True &Co bra 2 might end up as the second perfect bra, but I have only owned it for a few days. If you have a prosthesis, sew in a pocket because it really changes how the bra fits. I have gone without one, but there is so much more comfort with the pocket.
My next challenge will be bathing suits. I am not really looking forward to this, but who knows...it might work out as well as the bras. I have realized that being pregnant a lot has made me think about clothing for the short term because my body has constantly been changing. This has made it hard for me to commit to certain things I really like. It also has made me feel like I'm back in middle school trying to figure out what to do with my ever changing body. It's more fun this time around because I always have the backup of yoga pants and a tee shirt, using mommy as my excuse. I also must mention that I recently bought a pair of overalls because they are back in style! I'm thrilled because overalls have been one of my favorite items of clothing ever. You may just see a pic of me wearing them soon. Hope this helps other nursing moms, because this is stuff I really wish someone had told me.
Sunday, February 22, 2015
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
Curious what my house normally looks like?
My little girls are MESSY! How did that happen with a mom who cannot focus when things look like this? This post is for the moms who might think I have it together because they came over after I'd spent hours cleaning. This is for the mom who has no idea how other mom's houses look like the Pottery Barn photos. We are moms and we have to clean probably a bit more than the average person.
Spring in February!
I caught myself jogging on the trail near my house thinking about a lot of random things. Yesterday my husband had the day off of work, so I got to actually go jogging at a time that was enjoyable. Jen and I have been running in the dark once a week (that is when I haven't been sick because this year has been terrible in that way). It is really great to get out into the night air when I normally wouldn't leave my house. Some nights it's been really cold, others pleasant, and sometimes we have run into large puddles of water. However, SUNSHINE changes everything.
As I flung open the door, took a deep breath, and thought about several minutes of quiet at 9AM, I gazed at the tall evergreen trees around me. Typically at 9AM on a weekday, I am finishing up a math lesson, rushing to put a snack on the table, and convincing my kids that reading our history lesson will be fun. I have mixed feelings about being a homeschool mom and running alone got me thinking. If I had my kids in school, I might be able to pull off running more than once a week during daylight hours. Maybe I wouldn't be alone, but still outside.
A few paces later, I realized something important. My oldest son is going to be ten in August. By the time he's twelve I could just leave the kids at home for a thirty minutes while I go for a run. My second oldest would be eleven and they could team baby sit the rest. Is this insane or genius? People have been telling me the crazy years of having six kids in eight years actually gets better. In fact, it becomes easy? Now I am starting to see some benefits.
The last couple of years I have been obsessed with trying to eat healthy, workout six days a week, and get rid of baby weight between pregnancies. Yesterday, I made a promise to myself. It's time for me to stop obsessing because time is flying. I still want to be healthy, fit, and slim, but I also want to enjoy being a mom of little kids. The trade is simple. For a brief few years I have to compromise. I cannot run at 9AM, or take a dance class, but I have later to do that. I can continue to workout at home and jog occasionally.
Am I deflecting from the fact that I have put hours of work into losing weight and I haven't lost a pound? Even though the scale tells my things I don't want to know, my clothing is baggy. I have skipped measurements because I need a break from it all. I just want to be happy with how I look. I want breath fresh air and enjoy it. I want to go on a run and think about ideas for my screenplay, or books I plan to write instead of how fast each interval is going to be. It is time for a break and I'm fine with it. Maybe the main thing holding me back this entire time has been thinking about it all so much. I'm not saying it is wrong to want change after having babies, I'm just taking a break.
My husband told me once, "Happiness is a choice." He's right. I am making the choice to be happy with the fact my stomach isn't perfect, happy that I've worked hard and I'm feeling pretty strong, happy I can run fro 37 minutes after being sick at a nice pace and not get too tired...these are accomplishments. There is so much out there about results, but sometimes we are not asking ourselves what actually counts as results? Is it really just about being thin? Is healthy just about being thin? My answer, right now, is look for more than the basics and deciding to be happy will be much easier.
As I flung open the door, took a deep breath, and thought about several minutes of quiet at 9AM, I gazed at the tall evergreen trees around me. Typically at 9AM on a weekday, I am finishing up a math lesson, rushing to put a snack on the table, and convincing my kids that reading our history lesson will be fun. I have mixed feelings about being a homeschool mom and running alone got me thinking. If I had my kids in school, I might be able to pull off running more than once a week during daylight hours. Maybe I wouldn't be alone, but still outside.
A few paces later, I realized something important. My oldest son is going to be ten in August. By the time he's twelve I could just leave the kids at home for a thirty minutes while I go for a run. My second oldest would be eleven and they could team baby sit the rest. Is this insane or genius? People have been telling me the crazy years of having six kids in eight years actually gets better. In fact, it becomes easy? Now I am starting to see some benefits.
The last couple of years I have been obsessed with trying to eat healthy, workout six days a week, and get rid of baby weight between pregnancies. Yesterday, I made a promise to myself. It's time for me to stop obsessing because time is flying. I still want to be healthy, fit, and slim, but I also want to enjoy being a mom of little kids. The trade is simple. For a brief few years I have to compromise. I cannot run at 9AM, or take a dance class, but I have later to do that. I can continue to workout at home and jog occasionally.
Am I deflecting from the fact that I have put hours of work into losing weight and I haven't lost a pound? Even though the scale tells my things I don't want to know, my clothing is baggy. I have skipped measurements because I need a break from it all. I just want to be happy with how I look. I want breath fresh air and enjoy it. I want to go on a run and think about ideas for my screenplay, or books I plan to write instead of how fast each interval is going to be. It is time for a break and I'm fine with it. Maybe the main thing holding me back this entire time has been thinking about it all so much. I'm not saying it is wrong to want change after having babies, I'm just taking a break.
My husband told me once, "Happiness is a choice." He's right. I am making the choice to be happy with the fact my stomach isn't perfect, happy that I've worked hard and I'm feeling pretty strong, happy I can run fro 37 minutes after being sick at a nice pace and not get too tired...these are accomplishments. There is so much out there about results, but sometimes we are not asking ourselves what actually counts as results? Is it really just about being thin? Is healthy just about being thin? My answer, right now, is look for more than the basics and deciding to be happy will be much easier.
Friday, January 16, 2015
1 Month of No Breastfeeding
For those of you who have been following my pregnancy and postpartum posts, you might know that I have breastfeed for 9 years and nursed while pregnant with 4 of my six children. It has been amazing to learn new things about pregnancy nutrition and workout programs, but now I have a new focus for the first time in 10 years! Yes, you did read that right. I guess I would think that 9 years of breastfeeding was a large number, but compared to my midwife, who breastfed for 21 years, it seems small.
The longest I ever breastfed a child was just over two years. Most of my babies weaned themselves without my help. I was usually pregnant with the next child, so maybe my milk tasted bad. I have often read that. The shortest I have ever breastfed a baby was eight months. I am still frustrated I gave up nursing instead of trying to figure out how to eat properly for feeding and growing a baby at the same time. You have to eat a lot, and usually every two hours you are starving! You have to eat tons of protein. Give up on the crackers and eat nuts. Have lots of yogurt! Enjoy food, but don't go heavy on sugar and treats. Ice cream has some protein, but it's a not a meal.
My early workouts were very gentle. I mostly went on walks with my hubby and they were brisk, but I never knew much about other activities. I knew very little about being pregnant in general. Then I found an Erin O'Brien's pregnancy video at the library with baby number 3. I was depressed I could not enjoy running because it made my pelvis hurt, so I tried the video. It got me hooked and I did this routine 3 times a week. I used this video, combined with a pregnancy yoga routine for baby 4 and then I found Lindsey Brin (momsintofitness.com) after baby 5, when I was starting to really gain some weight.
The Lindsey Brin routines have been my favorite. She has a calender with all her programs and lots of calorie based information. I never really knew what was happening to my body when my belly was growing and I was losing weight the first trimester. Now I know that one burns about 300 calories just being pregnant. This does not mean eat everything in sight, but it also means a dinner salad is not enough.
Some of this is repeat information. Why am I still talking about it? Now I am in the phase that I know very little about. I have never had two full years between any of my babies and I don't know what it is like to not just burn calories from sitting around growing a baby, or feeding one. I stopped nursing and gained weight. I know that is not that much, but I had been creeping toward my 'normal' weight, and now this has held me back a lot! Around six pounds is probably going to take me six weeks to lose.
I know that I have little to complain about since I have never gained tons of weight, but I still feel the need to make some changes and I don't see who I once was in the mirror. It has been a long time. The reasons I struggle with losing weight are my love for cooking and being in the kitchen, feeling lonely, and being a foot smaller than my husband, but consuming close to the same amount of food as him.
Changes happen slowly and I plan to be healthy about how I lose this weight. I refuse trendy diets because I don't like them. I remember I never needed them in the past. That being said, I am eating one salad a day (and I hate salad...it is boring to me, but after some time and the right greens it is much better). Sweets are reserved in small amounts. I love chocolate, so 1tsbp in chocolate chips can be a treat from time to time or if I'm out with the kids, 1/4 of a treat I would have had the whole thing of in the past. Protein is still very important, so it will be a part of every meal. I will be using calorie count to figure out normal portion sizes of things and log for at least of week, but probably a month. I used it in the past and seeing values of foods listed out really helped me emotionally. I eat when I am sad, so this helped me figure out if I was hungry and tell myself I had plenty to eat.
Adding a friend to your goals really helps. I have a running buddy and we talk about how we are doing with food. After last week I decided to track my food again and send her my calorie count when I did. It might seem silly, but knowing another person can see my food lists helps me say no to things I might have eaten. Also, my actual weight is out there. I went from 114 at my lowest, to 118 as my constant, and now I see 125 on bad days, but usually 123. I don't want to get caught up with this though because my clothing fits fine, and I workout six days a week.
Workouts are usually 15-40 minutes depending on the day. I have one day a week of mostly stretching and one day when I let myself sleep just a bit longer. If I don't workout at 5:30 AM, I don't have time. I have to have a structured plan or I do workouts, but not very well. I noticed youtube has a lot of great stuff for free and so does fitness blender. Right now I am working on http://www.jessicasmithtv.com/ 's 21 day challenge. I had know idea how it would be, but I love the workouts. She has a lot of different kinds of workouts and some ballet barre based stuff that I really love because I miss ballet classes.
If you are a mom and you want to start working out, find a time you can workout everyday. If it changes, put it on your calender. I treat this as a part of my to do list and feel like I missed something when I skip out on the time. My baby is playing next to me while I workout, but it has been like this since he was born and he knows to leave me alone. It works well for us.
Maybe this information is not new, or maybe it is. I wish more moms of many wrote about how they felt about their bodies after many babies because I still have so many questions. I know that things like working out and eating can be very personal for everyone. I don't want to sound vain, but honest because I know most women struggle with extreme body changes. I plan to write in a month and update you on any progress. :) I hope I will have good things to report.
The longest I ever breastfed a child was just over two years. Most of my babies weaned themselves without my help. I was usually pregnant with the next child, so maybe my milk tasted bad. I have often read that. The shortest I have ever breastfed a baby was eight months. I am still frustrated I gave up nursing instead of trying to figure out how to eat properly for feeding and growing a baby at the same time. You have to eat a lot, and usually every two hours you are starving! You have to eat tons of protein. Give up on the crackers and eat nuts. Have lots of yogurt! Enjoy food, but don't go heavy on sugar and treats. Ice cream has some protein, but it's a not a meal.
My early workouts were very gentle. I mostly went on walks with my hubby and they were brisk, but I never knew much about other activities. I knew very little about being pregnant in general. Then I found an Erin O'Brien's pregnancy video at the library with baby number 3. I was depressed I could not enjoy running because it made my pelvis hurt, so I tried the video. It got me hooked and I did this routine 3 times a week. I used this video, combined with a pregnancy yoga routine for baby 4 and then I found Lindsey Brin (momsintofitness.com) after baby 5, when I was starting to really gain some weight.
The Lindsey Brin routines have been my favorite. She has a calender with all her programs and lots of calorie based information. I never really knew what was happening to my body when my belly was growing and I was losing weight the first trimester. Now I know that one burns about 300 calories just being pregnant. This does not mean eat everything in sight, but it also means a dinner salad is not enough.
Some of this is repeat information. Why am I still talking about it? Now I am in the phase that I know very little about. I have never had two full years between any of my babies and I don't know what it is like to not just burn calories from sitting around growing a baby, or feeding one. I stopped nursing and gained weight. I know that is not that much, but I had been creeping toward my 'normal' weight, and now this has held me back a lot! Around six pounds is probably going to take me six weeks to lose.
I know that I have little to complain about since I have never gained tons of weight, but I still feel the need to make some changes and I don't see who I once was in the mirror. It has been a long time. The reasons I struggle with losing weight are my love for cooking and being in the kitchen, feeling lonely, and being a foot smaller than my husband, but consuming close to the same amount of food as him.
Changes happen slowly and I plan to be healthy about how I lose this weight. I refuse trendy diets because I don't like them. I remember I never needed them in the past. That being said, I am eating one salad a day (and I hate salad...it is boring to me, but after some time and the right greens it is much better). Sweets are reserved in small amounts. I love chocolate, so 1tsbp in chocolate chips can be a treat from time to time or if I'm out with the kids, 1/4 of a treat I would have had the whole thing of in the past. Protein is still very important, so it will be a part of every meal. I will be using calorie count to figure out normal portion sizes of things and log for at least of week, but probably a month. I used it in the past and seeing values of foods listed out really helped me emotionally. I eat when I am sad, so this helped me figure out if I was hungry and tell myself I had plenty to eat.
Adding a friend to your goals really helps. I have a running buddy and we talk about how we are doing with food. After last week I decided to track my food again and send her my calorie count when I did. It might seem silly, but knowing another person can see my food lists helps me say no to things I might have eaten. Also, my actual weight is out there. I went from 114 at my lowest, to 118 as my constant, and now I see 125 on bad days, but usually 123. I don't want to get caught up with this though because my clothing fits fine, and I workout six days a week.
Workouts are usually 15-40 minutes depending on the day. I have one day a week of mostly stretching and one day when I let myself sleep just a bit longer. If I don't workout at 5:30 AM, I don't have time. I have to have a structured plan or I do workouts, but not very well. I noticed youtube has a lot of great stuff for free and so does fitness blender. Right now I am working on http://www.jessicasmithtv.com/ 's 21 day challenge. I had know idea how it would be, but I love the workouts. She has a lot of different kinds of workouts and some ballet barre based stuff that I really love because I miss ballet classes.
If you are a mom and you want to start working out, find a time you can workout everyday. If it changes, put it on your calender. I treat this as a part of my to do list and feel like I missed something when I skip out on the time. My baby is playing next to me while I workout, but it has been like this since he was born and he knows to leave me alone. It works well for us.
Maybe this information is not new, or maybe it is. I wish more moms of many wrote about how they felt about their bodies after many babies because I still have so many questions. I know that things like working out and eating can be very personal for everyone. I don't want to sound vain, but honest because I know most women struggle with extreme body changes. I plan to write in a month and update you on any progress. :) I hope I will have good things to report.
Monday, December 15, 2014
The First Writing Residency
When I walked onto 'campus' for the first time, all my past images of French writers freezing in a small cafe in Paris left my mind. Writers get to work in the Sun! Not only do writers get to write in the sun, but they get to live at a resort for ten days! You must be kidding me, I thought, but it was true.
It started my new adventure feeling like I was preparing for a birth. I packed a bag, filled with things I thought I might need. I was in denial that I was actually going to be away from my family for so long. When my husband asked me if I knew what my flight number was off the top of my head, I simply could not tell him.
There was fear, as there normally might be when something amazing is about to happen. Will I be like everyone else I was about to meet? Would my crazy side freak people out? Would I get all the reading done before workshop? Were my pieces actually worth reading?
Being a writer really forces a person to feel a part of a secret world that one thinks nobody understands. People aren't mean about it, they just have a glazed over look when one starts to describe the experience. Then, one steps into a world where everyone understands, there is a common language, and nothing is the same again.
It is so easy to forget that even though writers might enjoy alone time, they too appreciate community. Being without kids allowed me to participate in a world I have not experienced in nine years. I love my children. Leaving them, for a week of writing, was really difficult. However, remembering that sometimes I get to be just me, was really quite nice.
So enough of the sappy stuff. What happened to me? I learned that comments about my work was very helpful! I also learned that all the articles about an MFA being worthless are not entirely true. I have changed my entire manuscript because of really important feedback. It was good to stop hitting the pretend wall I had created for my own work. Writing in a writer's community was way more fun than mumbling through thoughts alone. Other writers are really cool. The brain can collect a lot of information in ten days, but beware of the fact that the day you get home might surprise you.
Just like after a birth, one might be really tired and extremely emotional. I must have cried a couple of times for not real reason. Mommy never stopped being mommy, but somehow, I am different. We all are. Being home felt like an out of body experience at first. Our house felt foreign even though I had barely been away. At the same time, everything was the same.
Do you ever recover from your first residency? Are you going to be hooked for life on being around writers all the time? These are questions I look forward to learning more about. Residency, you have become a new best friend.
Until June,
Marion
Friday, October 31, 2014
The Writing Universe
I must admit it has been a few years since I have looked at the book I wanted to have written and maybe published before my dad passed away almost two years ago. My mind floats away, back to a time when everything was exciting and I knew I could still hear his voice. Now as I write about my late high school years and into my college years I feel as if I am transporting myself into an alternative universe.
There are times that are still freshly familiar in my mind. The moment my dad dropped me off at college, the first time walked into my dorm room. Reliving the past to write memoir is and experience barely tangible to write about. How does one write a memory on a page in such a way that another person wants to stop and savor that moment? We think about this in fiction as I have heard countless French professors tell the story of the Madeline cookie in Proust and how the taste of the cookie and tea brings back a vivid memory of the past. I remember recounting my own memories, a time where I was singing a song in English in the middle of a church in Bangladesh and the Bangladeshis were singing the same song in their native tongue. I cannot remember how they sung it differently, but if I thinking about the song in English, the Bengali language faintly chimes in the background as it is woven into the way I hear the song forever. I can remember what everyone's passionately smiling faces looked like and the warm evening air. The scent of curry gently wafted through to room. Pink flowers were passed out to many of the women and we tucked them behind our ears.
It is amazing how one moment of a memory can bring back so many sensations. As I journey through a manuscript I have not been working on, layers of memories I forgot to write down emerge. I never worked on something for so many years. I never knew that the outline of hints could lead me to even more vivid memories. Each read draws me closer to the time on the page. I long to step into it. Then I hear a crash!
My kids are playing with water again and I have to go and take care of it. The present time snaps me back into actual reality. I am glad these distractions exist, or I might be swallowed up by visions of the past. Being present is much more important and there will be no past later, if there is no present. Even if the crash startles me out of a dream-like state... even if I am cranky because I wanted to stay there just a little bit longer...there is room to go back later.
The beautiful part of the writer's dream-like universe is that one gets to create it. I travel to the page in brief ten minutes chunks, hours linked together, and moments where I sit and think. It is a capturing experience, but I get to beg to be let go, or even find myself forced free.
People ask me often when I find time to write. Do I ever sleep and I tell them it just happens when I can make it happen. I write in small windows of time and larger ones if I can. I go to bed by 10:00 most nights and wake up at 5:30. I guess you could say writing is a part of my routine, just like meals and brushing my teeth. You do not have to be locked away never to be disturbed to write, you just have to be willing to open and close the door to the writing universe.
There are times that are still freshly familiar in my mind. The moment my dad dropped me off at college, the first time walked into my dorm room. Reliving the past to write memoir is and experience barely tangible to write about. How does one write a memory on a page in such a way that another person wants to stop and savor that moment? We think about this in fiction as I have heard countless French professors tell the story of the Madeline cookie in Proust and how the taste of the cookie and tea brings back a vivid memory of the past. I remember recounting my own memories, a time where I was singing a song in English in the middle of a church in Bangladesh and the Bangladeshis were singing the same song in their native tongue. I cannot remember how they sung it differently, but if I thinking about the song in English, the Bengali language faintly chimes in the background as it is woven into the way I hear the song forever. I can remember what everyone's passionately smiling faces looked like and the warm evening air. The scent of curry gently wafted through to room. Pink flowers were passed out to many of the women and we tucked them behind our ears.
It is amazing how one moment of a memory can bring back so many sensations. As I journey through a manuscript I have not been working on, layers of memories I forgot to write down emerge. I never worked on something for so many years. I never knew that the outline of hints could lead me to even more vivid memories. Each read draws me closer to the time on the page. I long to step into it. Then I hear a crash!
My kids are playing with water again and I have to go and take care of it. The present time snaps me back into actual reality. I am glad these distractions exist, or I might be swallowed up by visions of the past. Being present is much more important and there will be no past later, if there is no present. Even if the crash startles me out of a dream-like state... even if I am cranky because I wanted to stay there just a little bit longer...there is room to go back later.
The beautiful part of the writer's dream-like universe is that one gets to create it. I travel to the page in brief ten minutes chunks, hours linked together, and moments where I sit and think. It is a capturing experience, but I get to beg to be let go, or even find myself forced free.
People ask me often when I find time to write. Do I ever sleep and I tell them it just happens when I can make it happen. I write in small windows of time and larger ones if I can. I go to bed by 10:00 most nights and wake up at 5:30. I guess you could say writing is a part of my routine, just like meals and brushing my teeth. You do not have to be locked away never to be disturbed to write, you just have to be willing to open and close the door to the writing universe.
Thursday, October 23, 2014
Angry Mamma Hen
What is one of the worst things that a person can do in a not so great moment? Make a writer very unhappy! Here is what happens when a writer does not like what she has been told she is doing wrong. It ends up in a blog.
Normally I would keep this post to myself, but this is an issue I have been hearing about for eight years. Early in my time here in Port Townsend, I saw an article about how kids should be appreciated more in this small community filled with elderly people. There is a dance studio in amongst a bunch of offices on Water Street. These offices are for lawyers, artists, some other people. Everyone pays for their space..it is a place of business. There are some that require silence apparently, and some that are slightly less silent.
In my experience, dance is a great way to teach children structure. However, when a child is 4 or 5 that is just the beginning of such a structure. This class only meets for less than an hour one day a week. This is also the class were even younger kids might be around since if the oldest is 4 there is most likely a sibling that is 3, 2, 1, or an infant. Last time I checked a hallway was not the same thing as a library. Sometimes babies cry, which is treated better at the library than this hallway. There is a little bit more noise before and after the class...why might this be business people? Perhaps parents are desperately trying to get their children into the dance class we paid $70 a month for? Maybe we have some money invested into this too? If none of these little kids want to take a dance class anymore, chances are the won't be an audience for the next age group and so on. Is it possible to give the youngest kids a little bit of a break? It is only one hour, in fact less than that, of YOUR week. Your lunch break is probably longer.
I know that probably the 4-5 time slot is more of an issues other days as the younger age groups meet during this time. It must be frustrating to have to hear people in the public hallway of your building. I know parents in Port Townsend have different parenting methods. However, DO NOT ASSUME WE ALL PARENT THE SAME WAY!!!!
My family of 8, yes, 6 kids is probably one of the better behaved in town. So before you scan the hallway for the short little Asian (helpless looking woman in your eyes) taking care of SIX kids to yell at, observe that it is not my children running around the hallway. You might see my older kids helping me with my younger ones. My oldest is only nine. I bet you have been complaining about nine year old kids, right? Well hold your tongue when you see mine. You made him question why an adult would tell off their mom when none of her children were at fault! Yes, he is smart.
If you have a problem with a dance studio being in the middle of your office space, this is not the parents' fault. We are in search of high quality dance education and your building happens to be where it is. These complaints have been going on for years. I wish the adults in this building could actually start acting grown up. Most of us do not have time to be caught up in your petty office politics. Sometimes people are actually being disrespectful and I understand that, but if you have no clue who it is...KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT until you know!
Normally I would keep this post to myself, but this is an issue I have been hearing about for eight years. Early in my time here in Port Townsend, I saw an article about how kids should be appreciated more in this small community filled with elderly people. There is a dance studio in amongst a bunch of offices on Water Street. These offices are for lawyers, artists, some other people. Everyone pays for their space..it is a place of business. There are some that require silence apparently, and some that are slightly less silent.
In my experience, dance is a great way to teach children structure. However, when a child is 4 or 5 that is just the beginning of such a structure. This class only meets for less than an hour one day a week. This is also the class were even younger kids might be around since if the oldest is 4 there is most likely a sibling that is 3, 2, 1, or an infant. Last time I checked a hallway was not the same thing as a library. Sometimes babies cry, which is treated better at the library than this hallway. There is a little bit more noise before and after the class...why might this be business people? Perhaps parents are desperately trying to get their children into the dance class we paid $70 a month for? Maybe we have some money invested into this too? If none of these little kids want to take a dance class anymore, chances are the won't be an audience for the next age group and so on. Is it possible to give the youngest kids a little bit of a break? It is only one hour, in fact less than that, of YOUR week. Your lunch break is probably longer.
I know that probably the 4-5 time slot is more of an issues other days as the younger age groups meet during this time. It must be frustrating to have to hear people in the public hallway of your building. I know parents in Port Townsend have different parenting methods. However, DO NOT ASSUME WE ALL PARENT THE SAME WAY!!!!
My family of 8, yes, 6 kids is probably one of the better behaved in town. So before you scan the hallway for the short little Asian (helpless looking woman in your eyes) taking care of SIX kids to yell at, observe that it is not my children running around the hallway. You might see my older kids helping me with my younger ones. My oldest is only nine. I bet you have been complaining about nine year old kids, right? Well hold your tongue when you see mine. You made him question why an adult would tell off their mom when none of her children were at fault! Yes, he is smart.
If you have a problem with a dance studio being in the middle of your office space, this is not the parents' fault. We are in search of high quality dance education and your building happens to be where it is. These complaints have been going on for years. I wish the adults in this building could actually start acting grown up. Most of us do not have time to be caught up in your petty office politics. Sometimes people are actually being disrespectful and I understand that, but if you have no clue who it is...KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT until you know!
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